You may already have noticed a new page listed on this website, The Morris Plays. Please don't panic. I will not be slipping into tights, putting on make-up and trying to act, so there's no cause for alarm.

What's happened is that my partner, Mary-Anne Fahey, has adapted my book Water Wings into a play. And not just any play. Water Wings The Play is one of the most amazing pieces of theatre I've ever seen, and I'm not just saying that because Mary-Anne'll hit me with the toaster if I don't. I'm saying it because to see one actor play all ten characters without make-up or wigs or costumes or lighting or sets, just using acting, is an amazing experience.

Over the years you may have seen Mary-Anne doing comedy on TV — The Comedy Company on Channel Ten, for example, or Kittson Fahey on the ABC — and if you have you'll know what a brilliant comedy actor she is. If you know the book Water Wings, you'll know the story has sad parts as well as funny parts. What a lot of people didn't know till they saw Water Wings The Play is that Mary-Anne is a brilliant sad actor as well.

She actually created the play last year, and has already performed it in lots of schools around Melbourne. She wanted to make a play she could take into any school and perform in any space with four walls, a ceiling and a window that can be closed when the school handyman starts drilling concrete outside.

This is exactly what she's done. I've seen a few of the performances and the atmosphere has been incredible. Years three, four, five and six all sitting together, not sure what exactly they're about to see, specially the large number who've never experienced live theatre before. Some of them look a bit confused, wondering where the remote is. You can see some kids convinced they won't have a good time without a joystick. Then the play starts and soon they're laughing and crying with all the others.

When Mary-Anne talks to the kids afterwards, their questions and comments show they really relate to this style of performance. It's about stimulating the imagination. Sharing feelings and ideas in a way that only live theatre can. I reckon it's a real shame that so many kids go onto high school and study Great Plays on the printed page without ever having experienced the real reason they were written. That's why Mary-Anne decided to do it this way. So kids could experience real theatre in school without poor over-worked teachers having to worry about buses and group bookings and insurance and kids being sick in foyers. (Between us, Mary-Anne and I were sick in foyers seven times when we were kids.)

Mary-Anne likes performing this way so much she's decided not to stop at Water Wings. At the moment she's adapting Sticky Beak, and that play will be ready to take into schools soon. Once again, please don't panic. The cockatoo won't be real, though you'll think it is.

These plays aren't only available to Melbourne schools. On the Plays page you'll find contact details for Sydney as well. Mary-Anne will perform the plays absolutely anywhere as long as the number of bookings in that area allow her to cover the travel costs without having to sell my stamp collection. We live in Melbourne, so she'd go to, say, Bendigo for three performances whereas Brisbane might require half a dozen and Calcutta a few more again.

That's enough from me. If I don't get back to working on Deadly with Paul Jennings, he's threatening to put on tights and make-up and sing selections from The Sound Of Music.

Until next time,
Oo-roo

1 March 2000